watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize