You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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