Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
i don't wanna talk about it
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.