So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
