its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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