He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
