We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
we made out on top of his cat.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
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I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
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Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.