yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
