this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
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If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
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He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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