6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
