Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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