high people should be assigned attendants
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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