My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize