yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My life is pants optional.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
