Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
