i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize