if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
