How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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