Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
