he shaved USA in his pubs
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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