I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize