Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
