I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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