the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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