Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
