I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
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