so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Every concussion has its silver lining
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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