we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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