Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night