I love black thongs
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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