I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Redeem this text for a blowjob
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize