Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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