and next time when you feel me up, do it right
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
