You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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