so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize