i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
