I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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