i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
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You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
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I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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