yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
