So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
