Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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