she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
