i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
