Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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