rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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