I smell stomach acid.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
It's blow job season.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
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