I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
