pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
