Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
