just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
